Shift'n & Sift'n

House projects are so much fun! Of course, I say that tongue and cheek. Maybe some of you out there thrive on these types of things, but I’m not one. My internal wiring is more on the thinking side than the doing side. I can analyze a situation so much that it’s paralyzing. We’ve coined a phrase for it in our household, decision paralysis. I talk a big game, but I don’t really like change. I’ve just come to embrace a higher value.

After a few years in our current home, we (o.k. mostly Bethany) have realized what works and doesn’t work. I’ll spare you the details, but the layout is not working for our current situation. Every person is getting a new bedroom. I’m eyeing the shed!

Furniture is shifting like sand on a seashore and it’s leaving trouble in the wake. We’ve discovered there are 3 male packrats living in the home with a nostalgic gene. Moving beds around has unearthed some real gems even though some might call it junk. When gently prodded to get rid of a jersey or favorite baseball card the emotional backlash is intense. And I’m referring to the oldest male in the household!

In all the shifting and sifting the sentimentality got to me. I hit play on the sad country song mix and took a sharp right down memory lane.  

A picture’s worth a thousand words but you can’t see what those shades of grey keep covered. Shoulda seen it in color. -Jamey Johnson

If that doesn’t stir up all the feels, you need to check that pulse! I didn’t want to declutter my stuff. There are a lot of memories connected with my old coach’s jersey, et cetera. But I also didn’t want to remain in decision paralysis knowing that I needed to make the move. 

Forward movement is difficult when we enshrine the past.  We can only manage so much stuff before it eventually leaves us immobile. Capacity is a real threshold that change seems to instigate. All the creativity in the world will not make a square peg fit into a round hole. Unless the square peg is whittled down.   

There is a tension in grasping both the past and present. How could there not be? One inevitably slides further from the other. The stuff has a strong emotional pull because it convinces us that the past isn’t on the other side of an impenetrable boundary. We may fear that letting go of the stuff is letting go of the past. But that’s simply not true. It’s the memories that have staying power far more than the stuff. There is something liberating when we take the memories and move on.  

Memories can be more powerful than reality and our memories are a gift from God. They are a mixed bag of experiences that give us perspective in the moment. This intra-home shifting and sifting has reminded me that stuff doesn’t enshrine the past. It’s the memories that do that and it’s the memories that go on. It’s hard to let go but it’s also liberating. And the memories, they linger.

Craig Rush